While looking back on all my vacations, I cannot remember a trip that did not have some part filled with anxiety. Whether it be before, during or after the trip, anxiety always reared its ugly face at one point or another. When I was younger, I allowed anxiety to control every part of my life. I never knew what was really going on with me until one day I have someone talk to me about their anxiety. I remembered how everything finally began to click. This was the day I finally began to accept anxiety for what it was and learn to over come it.
Overcoming anxiety or allowing it to not take over your life is hard. Day in and day out you constantly worry about everything. This fills you with thoughts and emotions, so much to the point you feel overwhelmed and you just cannot relax. Anxiety can take over your life and allow you to not live the life you wanted for yourself. This can also stop you from achieving or doing different things in your life. Money was not the only issue standing in my way of seeing the world. Anxiety was a major part holding me back from seeing the world because anxiety is real and it is a hard case to crack.
I finally decided one day I was not going to allow anxiety to take over my life. During my freshman year of college, I booked my first trip and patiently waited for the day to come. I never bothered with the thought of a trip till a few days before my trip. I began thinking about going to a new unknown place to what am I going to do for 13 days down there. When I began thinking about it my anxiety began showing it’s ugly face. On the night before the trip, I began having stomach issues, getting emotional and having uncontrollable shakes. I barely got any sleep, and sleep is super important for me with my epilepsy. My epilepsy has also caused my anxiety to increase because I worry about having a seizure when I do not sleep. None of the above symptoms of anxiety are fun to deal with if you have never had to endure anxiety.
The older that I get the easier anxiety becomes easier to deal with. I believe this because I have come to understand it better. The older I get, the more I learn. I have come to know what gives me anxiety and how I can overcome it. I also have learned overtime where my limits are. I have also learned how to push these limits, it is not easy but it takes an immense amount of strength. Doing things I’ve never done is hard for me to do because I do not like the unknown. Before my first trip I was a wreck, but slowly overtime it does become a little less. I now have less stomach issues, I do not get uncontrollable shakes and I sleep more than I did when I first began going on trips. I still struggle with anxiety but I have accepted it as something that is a part of my life.
If you made it this far while reading this post, thank you for taking the time to read this. Anxiety is a huge part of my life, but I am proud of how far I have come to try and overcome it the best I can. I want to share these struggles and positive outcomes with you. Whether you are struggling with anxiety or know someone who is, this will touch your heart in one way or another. I know anxiety will always be there, but this is why I have decided to make it a part of my blog. This holds me accountable for what I say, as well as hopefully inspires and helps others. Next week I will share my own personal ways I push my limits for anxiety, so stay tuned! As well as share a few stories that have gone terrible wrong or really good for me with my anxiety. Later this week I will have a guest blogger, cannot wait for you guys to see what he has to say. See you next week! If you haven’t Different Frame Of Mind Facebook Page and follow my journey there as well! See you there.